‘They Knew When to Take Their Foot Off the Gas’

To The Editor:
I will be the first to admit, when it comes to youth sports, I can’t stand the new political correctness of not keeping score. What does a kid learn by not having a winner or loser? Character is built and instilled when you learn how to deal with adversity and sports is a great way to teach this. It should also be known that I hate losing! I am very competitive and can’t stand to lose.
I have had the dubious pleasure of experiencing the lows of youth sports as my oldest son has now been on a football team and hockey team that is now a com-bined 1-11. It eats away at me that he has done all that has been asked of him; practiced like he is supposed to, listened to his coaches, and always given his best, only to see the same result. That, however, is not what I am upset about.
During the football season, win or lose, he loved every minute of it. Lower Township Coach Tom Con-nely, his staff and the other coaches in the league did an excellent job of making sure that the kids not only learned the sport, but had fun doing it. Cultivating a group of kids that, even though they only won one game, had fun doing it and will want to continue to play the sport. The fun they had was greatly due, in part, to the other team’s sportsmanship. When up big, the other teams knew when to play their second string kids. They knew when to take the foot off the gas. They knew that playing a bunch of dejected kids was no fun for anyone. And they also knew that in the end, they would still win the game.
This is a lesson that the Lower Township Hockey Association and some of its coaches have seemed to miss. First, let me say that not all of the coaches and officials have missed this lesson, Steve Gindville and his assistants, among others seem to understand this, but the few that don’t have ruined it for everyone else. Can someone tell me what having two dominant teams and four inferior teams does for competition? Can someone tell me what good having a kid in the fourth grade playing against kids in the second grade does? Other than securing a long-sought after championship, and I’m sure a four-year contract extension for the coach, what does it teach the kids? For that matter how does it help that particular kid improve? What it has accomplished is making many kids give up on the sport, a sport that could use as many kids as possible as the numbers continue to dwindle.
Here is the lesson that some involved in the Lower Township Hockey Association have missed. Keeping your star players in when it is 12-0 in the second pe-riod, helps no-one. Calling penalties and close off-sides calls on a team down 12-0, helps no one. Parents cheer-ing and screaming when the 12th goal is scored like they just won the Stanley Cup, helps no-one! What it does is hurt everyone else.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I am not some “bleeding heart, everybody’s a winner, life should be fair” parent. When your kid beats my kid, my kid will be taught to shake hands, tell him good game, and work harder for next time. But when your kid beats my kid, steps on him, holds him down so his little sister can get a swing in and then the parent gives a thumbs up, my kid will be taught to walk away…you are not worth his breath.
So for those in the league who want to win at all cost and disregard all the principles of what youth sports are about, call me. I’ll buy you and your team the biggest trophy out there. I will hold a parade down Bayshore Road for you. I will put out multiple press releases, and then I will tell you to go home so that the other kids, coaches and officials who are truly trying to teach kids and cultivate an understanding of sportsmanship and a love of the game can have fun. Then may the best man win.
My kid’s team may go 0-12, 0-20, or 0-whatever, but if they do, it will be because it was done right and it was still fun.
CHRIS BEZAIRE
Cape May